An unwelcome golden shower... O_o

This dream was a couple of days ago. And yes, this one is about that same guy who's in my video classes. Like all other dreams I've had about him, this one was non-sexual as well. But the disturbing content of the dream seemed to compensate for the lack of sexual elements.

It started--or at least the part of the dream I remember started--with me coming into the photo lab at school. In my hands were a few items--perhaps books--that my classmate had misplaced somehow, and I had come to the lab to recover these to him. Although he's not a photo major in waking life and wouldn't really be attending class in the photo lab, in the dream he was, and I found him sitting at one of the back tables. I approached him with his items, placed them in a nearby chair, and sat down right in front of him. As I sat down, he leaned a bit toward me and said something that sounded like, "If you want to sleep with me, I have something to tell you first." The next thing I knew, he took out his penis (which, in the dream, was unusually small) and began urinating on me. He squirted urine all over my clothes, my face, in my hair, and some of it got into my mouth.

Shocked and disgusted, I sat there for a minute or two. Then I ran home in tears. Once I got home, I changed out of my clothes and put on a fresh tee shirt. For some reason, I chose not to take a shower before changing, in spite of how unclean I felt.

Throughout much of the dream after that, I kept rehashing on what this man did, saying that he had fooled me and that he wasn't the man he made himself out to be. I also kept vowing revenge against him for what he did.

When I recorded this in my journal at home, I concluded that this dream was a warning dream, telling me to be careful around this man--no, he's not dangerous, but he might be having some issues in his life that he's dealing with, and if I'm not careful in my interactions with him, he might take his frustration out on me.

What led me to my conclusion about this dream came from looking back at some recurring dreams I had been having about toilets. In general, a flushing toilet in a dream represents the purging of useless or unneeded feelings and emotions. If this is the case, then to expel waste from the body in a dream--in this case, urinating--must symbolize the release of said feelings and emotions. I believe that this was what my classmate was trying to do in this dream. And because I, myself, am an emotionally sensitive person, I allowed what he did to consume me, instead of "washing it away" and moving on with my life.

Because the message in this dream concerned me, I decided to stay clear of this man for at least a few days as far as communicating is concerned. I usually greet him each time I see him, but in order to keep from imposing on him, I decided not to. He may indeed be going through a tough time, and the last thing I want to do is make matters worse.

I've been researching dream art today.

I'm actually doing it for my art history class. I have to write a research paper on a topic relating to Renaissance or modern art. I chose, of course, to write about dream-inspired art.

It's kind of difficult to come up with references, but I'm trying. So far, I've found an article on Wikipedia, a few artists as examples, and an art show page on the IASD (International Association for the Study of Dreams) website. Now I need to look in actual books...and I have a feeling that I'll have a hell of a time. Anyway...

While I was looking at the Wikipedia page, I saw something I thought was cool. There was a link to another dream blog on which the blogger had posted drawings he had done based on his dreams. This gave me the idea that maybe I should do that with my dreams.

I want to see if I can find more sites like these. It would give me not only good examples for my paper, but also inspiration for creating my own art. I had always considered doing dream art, but I could never really make the desire into reality. This might be the chance.

An unfortunate event made for a hilarious dream. XD

It was disturbing, but funny nonetheless.

What happened to bring this dream on was that the guy I had talked about at the end of the last entry--the 27-year-old I'd been flirting with--had told me on April 29 (yes, I know, pathetic--I remember the exact date) that he was already seeing someone. "You're awesome," he said, "but I can't be with you." Of course, I took this kind of hard, and I cried off and on for about a week, but I kept myself together whenever I was around him; eventually, I got past my hurt feelings, and I continued to joke around with him. So far, everything's cool. He's thousands of miles away in Europe right now, and I kind of miss him, but hope he's having a good time. ("I'll stalk you when you get back," I told him the last day of class. LOL.)

Surprisingly, despite the disappointment on April 29, I still have yet to have a dream in which this man is the main subject. But because of the conversation between us that day, I had a dream about an acquaintance of mine from work--my classmate was in it, though--about two or three days later.

I remember that for much of the dream, I was in this strange room, and I sensed that it might have been my classmate's room. I think I was lying in bed, and my classmate was sitting in a chair at the foot of the bed, facing the bed.

Then the dream flashed forward to a scene in which I approached my work acquaintance somewhere outside and told him, "You know, since I can't do it with [name withheld], I'll have to do it with you." The next thing I knew, the dream had flashed forward to yet another scene in which my acquaintance and I were in my classmate's room, in bed together, naked. It appeared as if we were having sex, but I really wasn't sure; all I remember was that he was on top of me, and that he was kissing my neck. My classmate was no longer in the room.

(Now, what you should know about this guy is that he's a year younger than me and that prior to the dream, I was never attracted to him like that. But now I'm not so sure... O_o)

I don't remember what happened in the rest of the dream, but I know that it went on for a bit, and when I woke up, I was like, "What the hell?!".

I told my best friend first, because I know that she's been really good friends with this guy for a long time. Then I told the star of the dream himself, my work acquaintance, who thought it was hilarious (and now I mess with him about it every chance I get), as did my classmate when I told him. (I also told him that it was his fault.)

I don't really have much to say about the interpretation of this dream, except that this was obviously a remedy dream to get my mind off of feeling down about my classmate. It was a bit disturbing and quite amusing, but much needed.

A funny thing about my guy dreams...hehe...

Usually, whenever there was a certain guy that I had a crush on or obsessed over, I would have a vivid string of dreams about him. The dreams would be about anything--kissing, flirting, sex, marriage, babies, murder, even politics and current events. In one recent dream, I was standing in the front office lobby of my high school with my former crush--the same guy who was murdered in my mansion dream. But we were not back in high school; it was present day, and of all things, we were discussing the Iraq War!

The thing about these guys I liked was that none of them liked me back and, for the most part, avoided me like the plague. But then again I was in middle school and high school at these times; we were all kids, and as everyone knows, kids can be cruel...

Well, at 26, I find myself, once again, infatuated with someone--this time, it's a guy in my afternoon class. But what's different about this time around, besides our age and maturity level--he's 27, by the way--is that we have actually communicated with one another, on more than one occasion. I've also flirted with him a bit. (In the past, I had never had the courage to communicate or flirt with anyone, and instead, I would send intrusive little notes, thinking that this was the only way I could get anyone to speak to me.)

What's also different about this time around is that I have not had one dream about my colleague yet--no, wait, I take that back. I've had one dream about him, in which I kissed him and he pushed me away. Other than that, I've had none about him that I can remember.

I believe it's because I've actually talked to this man, rather than obsessing about him and sending creepy notes. Back in middle and high school, I had a desire to talk to the guys I was into, but was afraid to because of the rejection I was already experiencing, so it showed up in my dreams. More than anything, I just wanted communication, and to be accepted by these guys. And I got neither.

But my current situation seems to be working in my favor; the guy I'm talking to is a pretty nice guy and surprisingly easy to talk to--this is coming from someone who doesn't warm up to people very easily--and he seems to accept my company. Even if the two of us never hook up, chances are that I'll still have a friend, or at the very least, a good acquaintance.

I'm actually kind of pleased that I'm not having any dreams about this man. Less mental clutter for me to deal with... :p

Lights out.

Such was the case in a couple of recent, very short dreams, which I believe could go into recurring mode. The first, I believe, was either on Monday or Tuesday, and the second was on Friday.

In the first dream, there was still daylight outside, but the sky had dimmed a little, and the stove light in my kitchen, which I always keep on in waking life, had burned out, and so had the lights in my bathroom. Also, the television was off, there was no music playing on the radio, and even my cell phone had stopped working.

I remember waking up and noticing that all the lights were off. Then I saw that my phone wasn't working--specifically, the screen had gone black and the icons on the screen were scrambled--and I spent a few minutes trying to think of a way to fix it. After a while, I got up and looked around the apartment, puzzled as to why my lights had stopped working.

I don't remember everything that I looked at, but I remember seeing the darkness of the kitchen and the bathroom. In the last part of the dream, I was standing in my closet, facing out toward the window, when I suddenly felt myself being pushed back into the closet. Then I woke up.

In the second dream, the sky was darker, and it must have been pitch black outside, because there was no light shining through my window. I woke up and noticed that all the lights in my apartment were out except for one of the lights in the bathroom, which itself was extremely dim. This disturbed me greatly, and I got up out of bed to inspect and to replace the dead bulbs. I had realized that the lights in the bathroom and the kitchen had burned out, so I tried to turn on the overhead light in the kitchen, but that light, too, had burned out. Then I tried to turn on the wall light facing my bed, but that light was out as well. I finally tried turning on the lamp on my dresser, and of course...

At this point, I was thinking, "Great--all my lights are burned out." Part of me was thinking that maybe a fuse had blown. Then I remembered the light in the closet. So I flipped the switch and was relieved to see that the light still worked. I don't remember exactly what happened after that, but sometime after I turned the light on, the dream ended, and I woke up, relieved to see that there was daylight outside, and that my lights were still in working order.

I don't know exactly what to make of these dreams just yet. Part of me is hoping that these dreams are not some terrible omen about something in my life. But I believe that more likely, these dreams are expressing a fear that I have failed to acknowledge in waking life. Or perhaps they informative, telling me that I am "in the dark" about something.

I may have to meditate, and I'm definitely going to pray over this. Only God knows the answer to these dreams right now, and He's the only one who knows where this will take me.

"Some of the content before you..."

This dream was back in February, actually. I thought to write down the main elements and analyze them before putting it all in my journal.

Because of the varying themes, I believe that this was actually a series of several dreams in a single sleep cycle.

I remember that in the first scene, I was in my apartment, but my apartment was more like a spacious condo, with a beautiful wood finish, a huge living room, a nice, roomy kitchen, and steps leading to a foyer. There was plenty of light, and long, brown drapes that hung from tall windows. As I recall, I had several people visiting my apartment, none of whom I recognize from waking life, and some of them kept pulling down my drapes.

After the scene in my apartment came a scene with a strange warning. It was about a dangerous internet icon, a cartoon dog who hacked into people's personal information and used it to defraud them. This scene never popped up again.

Then came a recurring scenario about a group of miniature cartoon characters who appeared to be a cross between the Care Bears and another group of 80s cartoon characters called the Shirt Tails (at least that's what I think they were called), and they all lived in my apartment. There was also a middle-aged, blonde-haired madwoman, whom I'll call the "cookiemaker," because in the dream, she baked a batch of evil "killer cookies" that came to life and went out to kill the cartoon characters living in my apartment. Eventually, one of the cartoon characters was killed by the cookies while trying to fend them off along with his friends.

Somewhere down the line, a reenactment of Lord of the Flies began to play itself out, with Bruce Willis playing the part of "Simon." For those who haven't read the book, Lord of the Flies is a story about a group of adolescent boys who become stranded on a deserted island after their plane crashes. Somewhere in the story, the boys hunt and kill a wild boar for food. They cut off the head of the boar and impale it upright on a stick. "Simon" is the one who goes crazy and begins to believe that the boar's head is talking to him. In the dream's version, however, the "cookiemaker" is the one who is killed, not a wild boar, and her head is cut off also, but rather than being placed on a stick, the face on the severed head has transformed into a hideous monster. Also, while "Simon" eventually dies in the original story, in the dream, he is the last man standing, left to his madness.

Sometime after the death of one of the cartoon characters, and before her own death scene, the "cookiemaker" arrived at my apartment with her boyfriend, both of them dressed in swimwear (apparently I had a pool, although I had never seen it). For the entire scene, they stood outside the entrance to my apartment. But there was something different about the "cookiemaker"--rather than the evil, maniacal, middle-aged madwoman I had seen before, I saw a sweet young girl about my age, somewhat ditzy, and very much in love with her boyfriend. I began to feel sorry for her and grieve for her as I watched her with her boyfriend, because I knew what "Simon" was going to do to her. Fortunately for me, the scene changed before it got to that point.

The next thing I knew, I was going door-to-door with my mom, visiting relatives, mainly my nieces, nephews, and their parents. We had come to their homes to examine the toys that the kids were playing with. Each toy had a hidden message encoded within it, and Mom and I sought out to decipher these messages. Among these strange toys, I saw Barbie dolls with special-made, reinforced legs, and action figures whose heads popped off with little or no force.

During these toy examinations, the television was on, showing various programs. I paid no attention to the television until the very end of the dream, when an infomercial was about to air on FOX-41. Only the voice I heard on the preceding opening announcement was that of one of the WAVE-3 meteorologists, and the voice said, "Some of the content before you is a scene before you." Just as the infomercial was coming on, the dream ended, and I woke up.

As soon as I woke up, I tried as best I could to hold on to the key elements before my recall faded, wrote them down, and thought about what the dream was trying to say. It actually didn't take me very long to figure out the main message.

It's pretty obvious that this dream was an information dream, reminding me to look carefully at my life and the world around me--things are not as they seem. This is true for a lot of things. When you think about it, every one of us has had to put on some type of "game face" when presenting ourselves to the outside world--sometimes to be professional, sometimes to hide insecurities and inadequacies about ourselves, and sometimes to hide evil intentions.

The infomercial was a perfect example of this idea. Many of the infomercials we see on television offer products that the advertisers claim will change consumers' lives, and in many cases, they have to stretch the truth or exaggerate in order to get their products sold.

There were also other elements in the dream that conveyed this message. Take the "cookiemaker," for instance. She was at first portrayed as an evil mastermind, but later turned out to be a sweet, ditzy young girl who was in love. The Barbie dolls were stronger than they appeared to be, and the action figures were not so tough as they appeared to be.

I'm not quite sure where Lord of the Flies, the cartoon characters, the dangerous dog icon, or even my apartment fits in to all of this--this is why I said this might have been several dreams in one cycle--but this was the message behind all I had seen. Only time will tell how this will apply to my life.

Sorry for the long delay, people...

I haven't had any dreams to blog about lately.

Hopefully now, I'll be able to come on here more often. I've just had a little dry spell...